If somebody close to you has recently gotten engaged and you have been asked to be their best man, you may be wondering exactly what your role will entail and what responsibilities you need to be aware of to help your friend’s big day run as smoothly as possible.
You probably know that the best man is the one to organise the stag do, but what else does the role really involve? It’s actually a role with far more responsibility than you may realise! We’ve pulled together this guide to help you prepare for the big day.
Organise the stag or hen party
Most famously one of the main roles of the best man is to organise the stag do (or the hen party… if you are part of a same-sex wedding it isn’t uncommon for one or both of the brides to have a best man, and even in heterosexual pairings couples are mixing things up a bit these days).
What you arrange for the stag should be in line with what the groom wants, so make sure you have a discussion with him about it before you go full steam ahead with the organising. Of course, that doesn’t mean that you can’t plan a surprise, but make sure you do so without ignoring his wishes.
Attend the rehearsal
If possible, a great way to support the happy couple if by attending their ceremony rehearsal if possible.
That way, you can go step by step through the whole process and also make sure the groom is where he needs to be on the big day itself.
Help the groom get dressed
You will most likely be involved in helping the groom with the task of choosing suits for the big day, as well as helping him to get ready for the day itself!
Wait with the groom at the altar
As the groom’s right-hand man, you will quite literally stand by his side at the altar. Stand with him, keep him calm, and make sure that he’s on time!
Hand over the rings
Keeping hold of the rings and handing them over during the ceremony is another task that you will need to take very seriously in your role as best man. Losing the rings is obviously not an option, so have a plan for where you’re going to keep it and check it’s with you before you leave for the wedding itself.
Sign the register
The best man is often asked to act as a witness during the ceremony and sign the register, along with the chief bridesmaid.
Help organise staged photographs
With lots of people to organise, the photos after the ceremony can take an age without someone to help it along. As the best man, you can work with the photographers to get the right people to the right place quicker so everyone can head off to the reception without too much waiting!
Prepare a speech for the reception
Another huge part of your best man duties is to prepare your speech for the reception. You’ll want to strike a balance between making it funny, and making it awkward so the pressure is on to make sure you aren’t accidentally offensive.
Remember who is going to be in the room, and resist the temptation to embarrass the groom. You should aim to big up the groom, the bride, and their relationship while being amusing at the same time. This article from the Telegraph gives plenty of tips for writing your speech if you are unsure where to begin and is quite in depth.
Organise details on the day
You may be required to be responsible for quite a lot on the day of the wedding itself, from organising groomsmen and welcoming guests, to making sure that all of the vendors have been paid.
Traditionally, you will also be responsible for walking the maid of honour down the aisle, and dancing with her at the reception, as well as the bride and the groom.
You may be expected to collect gifts from guests, and decorate the getaway car, possibly even driving it yourself if there is no chauffeur!
Don’t get too drunk
With so much responsibility, you’ll need to keep a clear head, so although you may be tempted to calm your nerves with a number of stiff drinks, be sure to keep your alcohol intake to a sensible level.
This may sound like an awful lot to think about and a mountain of responsibility, but the bottom line is that you will feel extremely honoured to be asked to be best man! There is no greater sign that your friendship is solid than being chosen as the best man!